Turning 44 Today

11 life lessons I've learned and 1 ask of you

Today I turn 44.

As an immigrant, as someone who grew up in Section 8 housing and on food stamps, and as someone who is often screamed at online to “shut up and leave,” it’s important to me to express just how much and how deeply I value you. Your trust, partnership, and support goes such a long way, and for that I’m just so grateful.

And as I contemplate how to best move forward, I start by asking myself, what I would tell my 24-year-old self if I could travel to 2006 and speak with him?

Let’s Address This Me.

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11 Life Lessons

I’m sure this list may change in the future with added wisdom. For now, I present the "always do" and "never do" things I would tell my younger self...and I hope you might find inspiration from it as well.

1. Always remember to cut yourself slack and lift yourself up. Plenty of folks will try to tear you down—don't join them. Be your own biggest champion because sometimes you're all you'll have—and you're enough.

2. Always cherish the moment, not get lost waiting for the destination. The destination may come, or it might not. But that moment is here and what you'll miss the most. A movie night. A laugh in class. A snowball fight. Cherish it.

3. Always say yes when a friend calls you for lunch or coffee. Always. The older you get the more you'll realize that "no" you gave was the last time you ever spoke.

4. Always pay for lunch. Don't make a big deal out of it. People remember when you do something kind that you don't have to do.

5. Never remind someone you did them a favor. No matter how small or large, do the favor because it was right to do, not because you expected some reward.

6. Always protect the privacy and dignity of your life partner. Find someone who complements you and compliments you. Someone you can be vulnerable to.

7. Always treat your children with impeccable respect, especially when they screw up. How you treat them is how they'll normalize the world treating them. If they feel respected, they'll respect others, and they'll command respect of others.

8. Never let your anger decide your decision making. There's an old adage, "When you speak, speak sweetly, so if you must eat your words, you have a tasty treat."

9. Always act to change injustice with your actions. And if you can't, then speak out against it with your words. And if you can't, then steel yourself against its impact.

10. Always write down when you lend a friend or loved one money. Even your closest family. And even then, lend with the intent that if they can't repay you (because life happens), you'll forget about it. Cherish people more than money.

11. Always remember the difference between disappointment and regret. You can be disappointed you didn't achieve some goal despite your best, but regret comes from not giving your best.

A shout out to my amazing wife Ayesha, without whom I cannot fathom how much of a failure I would have been. If there's anything I've written or said that you appreciate, credit goes to her.

Today I’ll make my a birthday ask of you—that you make a charitable contribution to our 1000 Miles to Memphis voting rights march. Help us stand united against extremism, fascism, and voter suppression, and register 100,000 more voters this election. The only way we win, is together. Let’s get to work.

As a final reminder—your support makes this possible.

Join us. Let’s build. ❤️✊🏽

Qasim

Founder, Let’s Address This

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